The Wolf

Bruce C. Hafen talked about three wolves that can be detrimental to a marriage in the November 1996 Ensign titled, Covenant Marriage.  The first he said was, natural adversity, basically when trials come, they can cause us to falter or cause us stress.  The second is "the wolf of their own imperfections," this one is looking for faults and pointing them out in our spouse or ourselves or others.  I think there is one wolf that as a whole is the most damaging to a marriage, the third one, and he describes it as, ". . the excessive individualism that has spawned today’s contractual attitudes. A seven-year-old girl came home from school crying, “Mom, don’t I belong to you? Our teacher said today that nobody belongs to anybody—children don’t belong to parents, husbands don’t belong to wives. I am yours, aren’t I, Mom?” Her mother held her close and whispered, “Of course you’re mine—and I’m yours, too.” Surely marriage partners must respect one another’s individual identity, and family members are neither slaves nor inanimate objects. But this teacher’s fear, shared today by many, is that the bonds of kinship and marriage are not valuable ties that bind, but are, instead, sheer bondage. Ours is the age of the waning of belonging."  
Thinking about this wolf really is how Satan drives a wedge between families.  When we feel we are not bound to anyone or anything then our actions can reflect that way of thinking.  If we feel we are alone and our not bound to anyone it is easy to hurt others and be selfish in our choices because we do not care about the consequences or who it may hurt.  Satan will never have a body or family.  Our family and our ties are what help us get through our own trials and overcome our own weaknesses. I would not be half the woman I am today without my husband's love and encouragement. We are sealed together and because of that are able to raise a family together and rely on each other in all the ups and downs of life. If we were not bound together and loved each other it would be easier to fall into self-doubt and look for the faults in others.  I think we are good at keeping each other in check because we are an eternal family unit and having that knowledge affects the choices we make every day.  At the same time not being aware of each other can drive a wedge between couples.  He uses phrases like, you deserve to get something or doing something for yourself.  Think about yourself and what you want to do.  Don’t worry about others.  He also uses ideas like, it’s too hard to have children, children are too expensive and take up too much of your time.  He fills our minds with distractions like, social media, movies, tv, gaming and being prideful.  He is cunning and sees a weakness and will tempt and try you with it your whole life.  I am grateful that thus far my husband and I haven’t let these things take over our marriage.  We of courses have our own things to work on at times but we are pretty good and putting each other first.


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